I read an alarming statistic the other day, that stated that there are over 20,000,000 (20 Million) couples who have a sexless marriage, by the way this is just in America (USA).There are many relationship experts who revealed that intimate relationships took place less than ten times each and every year, I really could not believe this so I carried out my own research for over 3 months and confirmed that this was not only true the but number was rising.
Many believe that sex is just that, but a sexless marriage is a disaster just waiting to happen, both parties need intimacy and if they do not get it , then this only leads to affairs with other.When there is a continous neglect of intimacy and a sexless marriage persists this only leads to much frustration, anger, resentment, feeling unwanted , feeling unloved and infidelity will eventually happen, swiftly followed by divorce, is this the way marriage should be?, of course not, having a sexless marriage is like having a horse without a cart, a home without windows and doors, it makes no sense.
There are many people who are suffering in silence due to a sexless marriage, there are many reasons for this.Now if you can identify the real reasons that is the root cause of this then you can apply a solution.
I have listed below some reason why men lose interest in sex, the desire to please their wife.
(1) His wife doesn’t like to be adventurous when it comes to sex
(2) His wife doesn’t really enjoy having sex
(3) His wife doesn’t turn him on – he is no longer attracted to her
(4) His wife has gained a lot of weight
(5) He has erectile dysfunction
(6) He is involved in an affair
(7) He’s bored in the relationship
On the other hand, the reason why women lose interest in sex with their man and thus create a sexless marriage are listed below:
(1) Her husband treats her like an object – to her, sex feels like it is all about him
(2) She likes more traditional sex; he wants to do things she’s not comfortable with
(3) Her husband has let himself go and she is no longer attracted to him
(4) She’s angry at her husband
(5) She’s depressed
(6) She has a difficult time reaching orgasm
These are just some of the reasons which were taken from both men and women, those are just only a few that were reported when I did my research.
Many at this point might give up hope of a solution, so what can you do if your a going through a sexless marriage with your spouse.
You must open the lines of communication with each other.Deciding not to talk about sex is not going to do anything for either of your.When you ignore sex , it’s akin to having a large elephant in the room but not acknowledging that it’s there.Stop tip toeing around the subject and face it head on, if you don’t it’s only go to drive a wide canyon between the both of you.
Men find sex extremly powerful, whilst women tend to be the more in tuned with expressing their feelings and love in variety of ways, although this is not a clear cut statement, so please do not take this literally, we have both heard of stories where the opposite is true, but as a general rule the above statement stands,this is from my own research.
Now that that part is out of the way, what should you do now, well , begin to talk to each other about what you would like in terms of being intimate with each other,find a common ground of each others desires and continue on from there.
There might be a lot of resentment, bitterness and anger that is causing the sexless marriage, if this is the case then you need to find out the root cause, this can only be done if the lines of communication are open.This could be a good point to go to see a therapist who is trained professionally in this to help you both.When there is a lot of anger, hurt and bitterness, it is important to have a neutral view of the situation in order to identify the root causes.Although things get said, if forgiveness can be provided, then this will heal and help you both have a emotional and sex fulfilling relationship and a sexless marriage will be a problem no more.